Spouters

We’d nabbed the wizard, Zemblob the Magnificent, or whatever the hell he calls himself. Real Tier 3 asshole. Our wizard, Jim the Saves my Ass, had him in some kind of trance.
Now we had to hunt down his pet, the slimy, squirt gun thing. We’d been briefed, but never encountered one. We were in for a real treat.
As soon as I opened this door, we knew it was there. That nasty, burning chemical odor. Smelled like sulfuric acid.
We got lucky, lucky-ish, this was one of the stupider ones: talking to itself, softly, like a stage whisper. I swear to God, it sounded like it was announcing a baseball game. Unfortunately, the damned thing heard us too.
Ninety degree turn to the left, classic ambush for these things. Still, we had our orders. Sarge stepped around the corner and got it right in the face, a few drops splashed onto the side of mine, and my neck. He dropped, gurgling a scream through blood and vapor.
I grabbed his arm and pulled him back to Jim, and The Unnamed Doctor, shouting; ‘Get him back, all of you, get back. Fire in the hole!’
Grabbing the Willy P from Sarge’s belt, I got right against the corner, pulled the pin, let the spoon fly, prayed for half a second, then flung the thing down the hall as hard as I could. Tink, tink, tank, tink. I rolled back. Pop! Dozens of little, flaming bits of white phosphorus zipped by, hitting the wall to our right.
Three or four voices screamed, and there were a hell of a lot of wet, then crunchy, sounds.
We put on our gas masks and hustled back out the door. After three minutes, I went in to see if our objective was a success. Sure enough, through smoke and residual flame, it lay still. Down at a sooty dead end, it looked like a gigantic burnt marshmallow.

–Corporal David Knight, Charlie Squad, Project Star

Spouters are a very specialized type of shoggoth, engineered by the mi-go, and often exchanged in trade. Mythos sorcerers highly prize them. 

Spouters have two primary characteristics which make them valuable: they have very low intelligence, and are capable of propelling fluids at high velocity. They can create and extend a hose-like appendage, draw liquid from a nearby container, then project it at a distance. 

Able to follow simple commands and incapable of boredom, a Spouter remains stationary until a specified event triggers it. Generally, this consists of “remain here and project this liquid at the next thing which comes around that corner, unless it is me.” 

When excited, the Spouter produces mouths, eyes, sex organs, anuses, and/or all manner of body parts. The mouths speak (possibly shout) random statements the Spouter has heard, and the fluid projects from any one of these locations. A particularly gruesome option might be through an eye socket, bursting the eyeball and optic nerve in the process. 

Generally, the liquid used is some variety of highly concentrated acid. As it draws in the acid, it forms a placenta-like sac to protect itself, which it expels in the following turn, through some sort of temporary orifice. The loss of this tissue causes 1D8 hit points of damage, which cannot be regenerated. 

Depending on the intent of the Spouter’s master, any liquid may be employed, including highly flammable substances such as gasoline, though the Spouter has no means to ignite such. 

Generally, a Spouter will have access to four uses of liquid, each use being one quart/liter.

SPOUTERS, glistening and horrific projectors of liquids

Average Hit Points: 26
Average Damage Bonus: n/a (no physical attacks)
Average Build: +3
Average Magic Points: 10
Move: 8 (does not move unless commanded to by controller)

Combat
Attacks per round: 1
Spouters have no fighting attacks or abilities beyond spitting liquid at targets.

Liquid Projection 20% (10/4), range 10 yards, damage 1D6 if strong acid, otherwise, per substance. 
Dodge 0%

Skills
Listen 80%, Spot Hidden 80%., Stealth 80% (essentially 100%, minus the possibility that it is engaged in a needless activity, such as muttering softly, breathing, excreting, etc.).

Armor: none; halve damage caused by fire, electrical, and chemical attacks; mundane weapons (incl. bullets) deal only 1 point of damage per hit; regenerates 2 hit points per round (death at zero hit points).
Spells: none.
Sanity Loss: 1/1D4 as a motionless blob; 1D6/1D20 once triggered. 

CthulhuBob Lovely

My name is CthulhuBob Lovely, I live in my childhood hometown of Columbus, Ohio, and have a son and two daughters. I volunteer at MisCon, which occurs each year on Memorial Day Weekend in Missoula, Montana and help out at other shows.

In my younger years I had seen H.P. Lovecraft’s books in the collection of my older brother, Brian, who is also responsible for introducing me to Monty Python, Star Wars and many other things geek.

I began running and playing Dungeons and Dragons in 1977 at the age of 15, and Call of Cthulhu since its original publication in 1981.

I believe geekery and gaming can have positive effects on math, reading and writing, and social interaction skills, as well as family togetherness. I have three published stories online at
http://www.bewilderingstories.com/bios/lovely_bob_bio.html